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Someone get that fat guy off my chest! - It seemed like a good idea at the time... [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
terribleturnip

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Someone get that fat guy off my chest! [Oct. 27th, 2010|03:44 pm]
terribleturnip
How bad is it? I actually made a doctor's appointment. This hacking, not really productive, but yet not totally dry cough, the tightness in chest/throat, the not-quite chills, but still that vague fevery feeling...

I am the poster child for resisting medical aid. Well, at least until it's justified. The rules for things that are like colds, flu, etc. are this.

Don't go unless: a fever over 102 that lasts more than a day; or any fever that last several days; mucus that has a decidedly greenish or orangeish tint throughout the day, or comes regularly in quantities that near a tablespoon. Or has lasted more than ten days.

Well, kiddies, we've passed ten days and I'm only feeling worse. And there is that feeling that there's a fat man sitting on my chest, and not in a fun way. Plus there's that barking seal thing I'm doing, which could lead to an interesting Halloween costume, if I'd had more notice.

Carp. I really suck at being sick. What I want to do is barricade myself in my room with enough food, beverage and magazines to hold me over until I'm better or dead. And would prefer that the outside world completely ignore my existence until it's over.

Plus, there is no room in my schedule for being sick.

(Please don't tell me that if I had more room in my schedule, I might not be so sick. Seriously? I DO feel well enough to punch you in the head. I will ALWAYS feel well enough to punch you in the head. The day I don't, you can go out and turn the compost so there's room for me.)

And I'm honestly just posting this because I haven't been posting and it may be a couple of more days and I didn't want you to WORRY. So, don't start worrying now. And I'm not looking for sympathy. And for the love of all that's holy, don't be suggesting home remedies to me. The only thing I do worse than "being sick" is tolerating well-wishing and suggestions.

O
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Comments:
[User Picture]From: thatliardiego
2010-10-27 07:52 pm (UTC)
And there is that feeling that there's a fat man sitting on my chest, and not in a fun way.

Frankly, I've plumb run out of ways where this could even be described as "fun."
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[User Picture]From: sweetpea86
2010-10-27 08:09 pm (UTC)
SANTA!!!

Edited at 2010-10-27 08:10 pm (UTC)
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[User Picture]From: thatliardiego
2010-10-27 08:12 pm (UTC)
You freak. ;-)
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[User Picture]From: im_geva
2010-10-27 08:36 pm (UTC)
Oh, come on, don't you want to hear about how my grandmother used to cure colds with stinging nettles and candle wax?

(Actually, I think my grandmother cured her colds with bourbon...)
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[User Picture]From: sestree
2010-10-27 10:22 pm (UTC)
YES

Booze. Massive amounts of booze.

...and dandelion tea if you really wanna have a fun sick

just don't do a random drug test afterwards ;)
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[User Picture]From: bittibuddha
2010-10-27 08:57 pm (UTC)
i started coughing after I read this post. you see the power you have over us?
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[User Picture]From: pyllgrum
2010-10-27 09:26 pm (UTC)
Sounds as if you have a good plan.
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[User Picture]From: sestree
2010-10-27 10:22 pm (UTC)
I hope you feel better soon. 10 days is enough time for your body to kick it if it's gonna.
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[User Picture]From: skivee
2010-10-28 03:28 am (UTC)

Thanks for that.

Your succinct listing of the various properties of the giant migratory Mucusoids has quite put me off my tapioca pudding.
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[User Picture]From: dawntreader90
2010-10-28 03:10 pm (UTC)
I DO feel well enough to punch you in the head.

then i'm not *too* worried yet.
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