|Stupid Warning Labels
||[Oct. 3rd, 2007|08:26 am]
...I see those lame caution graphics, that yellow, red and black and my brain thinks "nothing that common sense won't take care of" but found myself actually reading the labels on the underside of my washer lid, waiting to see if "Large" was going to be enough water, or should I go for "SuperPlus" (because apparently Extra Large wasn't a good enough description...or "To the Brim" or "Too much laundry to actually wash effectively, plus you're going to wear the motor on your washer all to crap by putting too much weight in it while on the spin cycle". I guess THAT would be too long.)|
And sure, I'm already ignoring the "don't dry clothing that has had oil on it, including vegetable oil" because well, that would mean MOST of my clothing could not be washed because I have that special internal vegetable oil magnet in my body (strongest in my torso and in my eye, naturally) so oil stains are what my laundry is ALL about. Well, that and wine. Hm. They've got instructions for removing all sorts of stains -- including deodorant and anti-perspirant stains! But nothing about wine. Have you ever worried about getting a deodorant stain off of your clothes? I haven't. Wine, on the other hand...
But now I'm focused back on the dryer instructions...which I guess are on the washer lid because it's too hard to read the inside of the dryer. Plus, the label would burn off and become just more lint to to into your dryer exhaust and KILL you by setting fire to your entire house. Because that's what my washer lid is telling me. Actually, it's telling me that I shouldn't dry clothes with flammable liquids on them, since that might result in death, explosion or fire.
Now, for starters, I have an issue with passive talk such as "result in". Don't be such a pantywaist -- if you want people to take your warnings seriously, stop sounding like the department of motor vehicles. And I also have problems with the order of those disasters. It may kill you? Not if the first two don't happen, I'm guessing. I suppose if you were IN the dryer, the fumes might get you first...but if you're IN the dryer with your flammable liquid-impregnated clothing...well, you're in a whole world of hurt and probably NOT the kind of person who would be reading the warnings anyway.
"Do not put clothing that has flammable liquids on it in your dryer because odds are they're going to catch on fire, make your whole house explode and THAT will probably kill you, if you're home at the time."