?

Log in

No account? Create an account
The horror of the wrong socks - It seemed like a good idea at the time... [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
terribleturnip

[ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ]
[ archive | journal archive ]

The horror of the wrong socks [Oct. 30th, 2008|09:23 am]
terribleturnip
So a mutual friend winds up at work with socks, that while they appeared to be black at home, are now, in the office, clearly blue. She surmises that perhaps there is a lesson to be learned.

O yes. There are several. Pick one:

Lesson #1: Turn on the lights when you’re getting dressed. Not the nice lights. The “omigod, I should just crawl right back into bed if I’m going to actually look like THAT today” lights.

Lesson #2: Wear your error with panache. Or elan – I had to look them both up, not really sure what the difference was. The former makes me think of food (penuche) and the latter make me think of antelope (eland) and I like elands better than penuche, so I would choose elan...but really, they're both French and I'm so damned tired of the French behaving as if they INVENTED food and fashion. So, I leave it to you to pick, but whatever, boldly proclaim that blue is the new black.

Lesson #3. Keep your legs hidden all day, move quickly when you have to leave your desk, choose the chair at the far side of the conference table.

Lesson #4: My usual choice and why I’m such a dork...make sure the entire office KNOWS you have the wrong color socks on. And that you’re either colorblind or need a higher watt bulb in the bedroom to the point. And you feel like such an idiot. And bring it up all day long to the point where they wish you’d just shut the hell up about the damn socks and will never, ever even look to see what color socks you have on in the future.
LinkReply

Comments:
[User Picture]From: sweetpea86
2008-10-30 01:34 pm (UTC)

separated at birth?

I swear to you on a wheel of Wensleydale I was just about to post that *I* too chose The Wrong Socks today.

Plus I'm wearing an orange bra. But that has nothing to do with my hosiery foible.

Edited at 2008-10-30 01:35 pm (UTC)
(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: im_geva
2008-10-30 01:42 pm (UTC)

Socks? try shes!

I had two pairs of my very favorite pumps. Low heel, non-toe smashing, conservative. I wore a black one and a blue one to work. I was trying not to wake up H(1) - he got kinda grumpy when I woke him up.

I blamed it on the nascent eye infection. And yes, I think I did go to the doctor's office that afternoon in two different shoes.
(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: bittibuddha
2008-10-30 01:45 pm (UTC)
I too took path #4 and pointed my error out to anyone who would listen. it took someone smarter than me to point out that though the socks were not black, they did compliment my blue blouse and I should shut the hell up.

I was strangely dissatisfied to learn my ability to coordinate outfits was completely out of my conscious control. such is I suppose.

Today's issue was that I still have price tags on things I bought last night and so have revealed my age by referring to Minnie Pearl to the gaggle of office 20-somethings. They responded with the blank stares of the young.

damn them all.
(Reply) (Thread)
(Deleted comment)
[User Picture]From: macdobhran
2008-10-30 01:59 pm (UTC)
You know, you're the second (sweetpea86 being the third) person this week to post about wearing the wrong socks. So I'm going to give you all a tip that my father taught me when I was but a wee lad.

After you wash all your dark socks and pair them up, simple fold the black ones over once and put them in the drawer.

For the blue socks, turn them socks inside out first. Then put one arm through an entire sock and grab the "toes" from the inside. Use the other hand to grab the "heel". Pull toes through with one hand while holding heel. This will form a small "mouth" at the heel. Place sock flat, mouth side down. Place second sock on top of the first. Roll tightly from leg end until you reach the "mouth". Fold into the mouth and invert it inside out, making a tight little pillow, squaring off the corners.

This way even in the dark you can tell just by the feel of the sock what color it is.
(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: bittibuddha
2008-10-30 02:02 pm (UTC)
and I thought ~I~ was anal. Dood. you're CDO... its like OCD, but in alphabetical order.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
(Deleted comment)
[User Picture]From: bittibuddha
2008-10-30 02:48 pm (UTC)
Dawnie would OMG-UNFRIEND! you for saying such a thing.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: dawntreader90
2008-10-30 03:01 pm (UTC)
seriously. for the love of GOD. all you have to do is have separate sock drawers so you know what colour drawer you're getting your socks from. i have a black and white drawer, a coloured drawer, and a funky/fancy/designer sock drawer.

this is not to be confused with my pantyhose drawer and my separate trousersock/kneesock drawer. (i have problems. and small sock drawers.)
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
From: kudrasslipper
2008-10-30 03:51 pm (UTC)
You have THREE DRAWERS dedicated to socks? I'm going to have to start calling you Mom.

(I thought only lesbians had the sock fetish? you know, what with all the outdoorsy stuff they do to go along with their 3 closets for timberland and columbia sportswear?)
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: dawntreader90
2008-10-30 04:03 pm (UTC)
i missed the shoe gene. i just got socks. hee!
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: dawntreader90
2008-10-30 03:02 pm (UTC)
you obviously don't understand the importance of socks.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
(Deleted comment)
[User Picture]From: dawntreader90
2008-10-30 02:58 pm (UTC)
i'm having a hard time even following what you just said.

do you seriously make sock pillows? or are making that up?
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: terribleturnip
2008-10-30 03:01 pm (UTC)
Wait. Your socks are folded. Near Double Windsor folded.

What kind of alien are you?

That only happens if the Captain does my laundry.

I open drawer, tip laundry basket, fill drawer. And applaud myself because my clean laundry made it into a DRAWER.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: ferlonda
2008-10-30 06:18 pm (UTC)
I'm so jealous! You all have drawers, I have freezer zip-lock baggies. And yes, my socks are sorted into three bags- daily wear, eye-blinding knee highs and other, which is mostly stockings and other sexy type legwear. But I also have some sort of near-psychic ability to know what item of clothes I am touching no matter how dark the room is. I would go nuts trying to fold my socks- besides, it stretches the elastic and then the socks are different and I can't have that.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: lowlandscot
2008-10-30 02:28 pm (UTC)

You are all setting the bar way too high

I'm not wearing "the wrong socks" unless one is red and the other is yellow or something equally ludicrous. And I'm not wearing "the wrong bra" unless it belongs to Rachel and will only cover one boob.
(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: pyllgrum
2008-10-30 03:14 pm (UTC)
I never look low enough on a professionally dressed woman to notice if she is wearing shoes, let alone whether her socks match.
(Reply) (Thread)
(Deleted comment)
[User Picture]From: pyllgrum
2008-10-30 03:31 pm (UTC)
Actually, I most often see professionally dressed women walking the halls in my office, and at my age, I just try to make sure I don't trip and knock them down.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: mistressfetch
2008-10-30 03:49 pm (UTC)
Try being color deficient and a product of the United States Navy where Black IS Navy Blue...WTFIMIK? ummmm I can't tell you what color they are AND (note my frustration) you are telling me they AREN'T really the colors they are supposed to be...

(Pulls out hair in frustration)...

Moral of this story..When in public you will NEVER see me wearing socks...always tights or pantyhose...unless I'm skiing or sledding...then, well, who cares....

harumpf!
(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: skivee
2008-10-30 04:25 pm (UTC)
I think that it's pretty disgusting that you are trying to divert voters with all this dismissive talk about sox education. Sox are a natural and wholesome part of the human experience. There is room for all colors and types of sox; and there is nothing wrong with that. Social pressure is no way to mandate such a personal choice.
STOP FOISTING YOUR PREJUDICES ON MY ANKLES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: lowlandscot
2008-10-30 04:29 pm (UTC)

Sox Education

Oh, just move to Massachusetts, for the love of spandex. Then you can have all the Red Sox you want.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: skivee
2008-10-30 04:33 pm (UTC)

Re: Sox Education

Hmmmm, I would have thought that they were a Blue Sox state.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: lowlandscot
2008-10-30 10:42 pm (UTC)

Re: Sox Education

And when I say "Red" Sox I mean, uh, you know.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: skivee
2008-10-30 10:44 pm (UTC)

Re: Sox Education

Ah, right. My mistake.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)