|Clambering over the technological hurdles with my usual speed and grace: One picture
||[Aug. 23rd, 2011|11:30 am]
Okay. This is why I regard technology the way my horse Damien used to regard the electric fence. Creeping up on it, reaching out gingerly, just touching one little whisker to it. |
Because sometimes there's no current and you can push right through it. And go visit the horses down the street and then wander back inside in time for dinner. Damien wasn't a horse so much as an overgrown dog. We should have just put a collar with an ID tag on him.
A couple of years ago a younger friend, liking the music I was playing, asked if I could burn a copy for him. "Okay, I'll TRY" I said, sighing. And he looked at me as if I were an idiot. I'd never tried to burn a CD on my new computer. Heaven knows, I used to do it on my old computer, burning sound effect CDs for Halloween and it was a painstaking process, and a definite crapshoot as to whether or not it would work. I'd been shocked by that fence before. So I went home,girded my mental loins, gingerly inserted the disk, and a friendly little pop up box asked me if I wanted to burn a copy and I said yes, and it did. When the hell did THAT get so easy? No wonder my friend looked at me as if I were someone's grandmother trying to program the VCR.
So, okay, since I don't have a paid account, I'll make this easy and set up a photobucket account, scan the picture I want, upload it...whee, this is easy! Now I just click on paste....and nothing. And nothing. And then I try this...and that...and look, I have expletive to DO today...and then finally, finally I make it work.
Because sometimes the current is ON and that's when you remember why you HATE learning new tech!
Right. Oh, so many options. I was looking for one that summed up the younger me, in all my awkward gawkiness. Emerald Green turtleneck under which I should have been wearing my first bra, plaid pants in neon colors, frizzy hair, greasy complexion...and false nose and glasses. But I can't find it -- and I've only allotted so much time for this trip down memory lane. Oh, there's other awkward -- what's with the picture of me and my aunt posing in front of the Christmas tree, wearing MATCHING outfits, each holding an E.T. doll? I never even saw the movie! What's up with THAT? Dozens of awkward, gawky, standing stiffly like a German tourist, slouching like an attitudinal pre-teen...
And then really, a picture of me on my horse, right? Except I was really the photographer of the family, so while there are great shots of my horses and great shots of the rest of my family with my horses....there are only pictures of me that were taken by my mother. Whose vanity did not allow her to wear her glasses unless she was driving. And for some reason, once the camera was up to her face, never thought "gee, maybe I should get closer, so we can actually TELL who that person is on top of that horse. " Or maybe she was just very committed to capturing the whole gestalt. I mean, why take a picture of just me and Damien clearing that fence when you could also include seven other fences, most of the riding arena, half the audience and a sliver of the parking lot?
And adorable baby pictures? Of course. I WAS adorable. Generic Adorable Baby. And putting up an adorable picture of me dressed up in the little Chinese outfit my grandparents brought back, or the...just reminds me of how horribly wrong it all went when the hormones came to town. And the annual going back to school shots - me in my first day of school outfit, clutching my brand new binder notebook, the choosing of which was always an ordeal -- standing by the front door...well, those are only fun if you get to see them as a slideshow. It's like a time lapse of awkward.
Anyway, in the end I chose this one -- because really, it sums me up, doesn't it?