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Whew, First Day of Auditions down..damn near killed me. - It seemed like a good idea at the time... [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]

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Whew, First Day of Auditions down..damn near killed me. [Feb. 11th, 2008|01:06 pm]
Oh, the auditions were easy -- a crack team of staff and veterans running the auditions; I'm mostly there just to get the systems working and to be the disposable person for when it becomes clear that someone needs to....fix the temperature, run out and get toilet paper, hold a door open, move chairs, cover someone else's function.

It was a long hard week. I'm still having to learn and wrap my head around so many new things at work -- it's a very, very complex environment and out of the 200 or so e-mails I get a day, very few of them can I just act on. I have to have someone else explain the who, what, where, and most of all WHY -- and then guide me through what I'm supposed to do about it. Then I do that, and I get an e-mail response....that opens a whole NEW can of worms. So, I'm spending a lot of time being confused, feeling stupid and flirting with despairingly overwhelmed. Which I don't handle well. Plus, while the snot fairy never actually moved IN, she's leaving her toothbrush in my sinuses, her socks on my lymph nodes and lipstick marks on my tonsils....so I don't feel quite...up to snuff.

So, Friday, I juggle 20 spinning plates all day, spend my entire lunch hour making changes to our audition forms to incorporate all the changes we decided on. Complicated by the original doc being done by someone who has a master's degree in Word Formatting -- and the changes being done by me, the village freaking idiot.

It's 5:20, which means I'm leaving late and the amount of urine on the floor of my bedroom is doubling. It's not until I'm pulling out of the parking lot that I realize that I never downloaded the new changed form onto my memory stick. I u-turn, pull back into the parking lot, run in and realize that since it's after 5, I need a keycard to get upstairs. Well, naturally, my keycard is already upstairs in my desk drawer. So, I have to wait until someone from my office comes downstairs. Finally, someone does. Of course, it's my VP and senior VP (my boss's boss and the uber-boss), who are both guys, so not only do I have to ask them to key me upstairs, but they're both guys, so their keycards are buried in their briefcases, since they don't really need them for anything except to get in each morning.

I get upstairs, download the file, breathe a sigh of relief and resign myself to an evening of mopping up pee and putting down Nature's Miracle.

It isn't until I get home that I realize that the other four forms I need to print out and get copied are also back there on my work computer.

And sure, I can have our Director e-mail me the forms, but....I still haven't fixed my internet at home. So, fine. Fine. I'll go borrow access at a neighbor's house. Harder than you'd think to find someone who's home AND has internet access. (While the only one on the street who's got a dog-piss-ruined modem, I am not the only one experiencing technical difficulties.) But thankfully, Van & Kerry (regine aubergine) are home, although entertaining guests, and they're the type of friends who would, if not give you a kidney, would at least let you borrow one for a while.

But of course, I get there and all set up and....my dear director, whom I've probably woken out of a sound sleep, didn't attach the files when he re-sent. And I, being an idiot of the FIRST degree, failed to bring my cell phone. And now, thanks to THAT bit of technology do not know anyone's phone number by heart. So, trot back down the street to get the phone, call, wake him up again, ask for a re-send, trot back up where my friends are now trying to sit down to dinner, despite their pain in the ass neighbor fiddling with their computer, and wait for it to show up.

More technical difficulties ensue, since the neighborhood's only working internet connection does not have a printer attached -- but that's okay as long as you have a memory stick to download the files to.

But that's assuming you download the files correctly, isn't it?

But first, I'm so stressed out by how difficult four forms have become and I need a food and cider break. Which I do, which explains why, at 10:30, I'm half in the bag and trying to make the changes to these forms. I know, I already made the changes at work...but I have a pterydactyl-age version of Word, and I'm savant enough to know that while I could have worked with and saved the form in the stone-age version of Word, I'm just enough idiot to have failed to do so.

So, now the form is, to put it politely, really fucked up.

But I plug along, because I'm Danish and German and only made MORE pigheaded by my increasing exhaustion. I fix it all, print it out. Turn my attention to the other forms, which I only have to print out and copy the next morning and....

Of course, I downloaded one of them twice and one of them nonce.

And now, although my friends are the kind of friends that you COULD wake up out of a sound sleep so that you could impose on them yet ONE more time...because you're an IDIOT, there is no way in hell this WASP can do that. No. This is a huge pain in my butt, but I want to save that kind of a favor for when I really need it. So, I write the guild description sheet from scratch, from the very depths of my omigodallIwanttodoisgotosleep, what the hell is wrong with me, NORMAL people are out partying and then sleeping in late tomorrow and I'm sitting at a computer and having to get up at 5 am tomorrow so I can haul my ass down to Fredericksburg and work at an unpaid volunteer job where I work harder than a lot of people do at their paid job and...

So, clearly, with all of that cider and sleep-deprived raging commentary going on, my recollection of the original, well-written document is a wee bit...shakey. So I move right away to composing the apology I'm going to have to deliver the next day to all of the guild managers and staff who I'm busy misrepresenting.

(For the record, to my face, everyone was incredibly supportive and seemed not to care one wit that I screwed this up.)

And, as usual, the warmth and fun and camaraderie (along with a few skilled neck rubs and massages) managed to unkink and unwind the steel pretzel I'd made of myself and by the end of the day, with several great cast candidates on the books, I felt much better about it all.

Now if only I didn't have a damn chef's meeting at the ass-crack of dawn on Sunday....

[User Picture]From: pyllgrum
2008-02-11 07:01 pm (UTC)
"So, I'm spending a lot of time being confused, feeling stupid and flirting with despairingly overwhelmed."

I'll come over in garb and we'll change your status to "flirting with incredibly overdressed"
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[User Picture]From: sestree
2008-02-11 07:09 pm (UTC)
I"m sorry dear overwhelmed one but I'm still chortling uncontrollably over the whizzing on the modem bit.

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[User Picture]From: mistressfetch
2008-02-11 07:24 pm (UTC)
yikes babe...then you had your crazed blonde friend strategically bugging you :-) I'm looking for an excuse to give buckaroo bonsai boy a car ride so ring me next time you find yourself in a pickle...(I'm really trying to get out of giving you a kidney..hehehehe)
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[User Picture]From: lowlandscot
2008-02-11 07:38 pm (UTC)

Holy crap...

If I'd known all this when I nodded hello to you, I might instead have just put the harp back in its case and slunk back out to the parking lot. Or at least hidden in the bathroom until it was time to play. Yikes. Even though you never let on, I would have been seriously nervous around you.
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[User Picture]From: terribleturnip
2008-02-11 07:43 pm (UTC)

Re: Holy crap...

Well, at least now you know why I was oddly unsociable. After you left, I thought "she must think that either I don't remember who she is...or that I'm an antisocial idiot who needs alcohol, or a hotel room packed to the gills with people, food, dogs and booze in order to strike up a conversation."

You sounded lovely, btw...believe it or not, I have no pull there, but I hope to see you on our stages! And have the faculties to listen and enjoy.
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[User Picture]From: lowlandscot
2008-02-12 04:23 am (UTC)

Re: Holy crap...

Actually, I was alternating between, "Ummm....I know I drank a lot that night, did I insult her dog? Spill something indelible on the carpet?" and "Wow, she's really busy today." Unless Melinda was cruelly toying with me, I will indeed be seen on your stages, although how enjoyable anyone will find it is up in the air. When they asked for a second piece "in a different style from the first" I impulsively punted Greensleeves on account of being a ripe old chestnut they'd hear two dozen times before the end of the day and pulled an obscure Morris dance out of my rear end that should have stayed where it was. All i can say in defense of the performance is that I refused to quit despite having no idea where the melody was; by the end I couldn't have told you what key I started out in, but e minor seemed as good as place as any to park it.
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[User Picture]From: regineaubergine
2008-02-12 04:51 pm (UTC)
Hey, you can come use our computer anytime! I'm hoping to get a whole new set-up and a new functional printer soon. Meanwhile, if the lights are on, someone is likely awake (or you can poke the lazy kid sleeping on the sofa) and will let you in for internet access whenever! Good luck with the dog peed modem.

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From: (Anonymous)
2008-02-12 07:22 pm (UTC)

First Day Auditions....................from the Rocketeer!

Um, have a cookie?
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