|The persistence of pickles
||[Sep. 5th, 2008|08:41 am]
This is of course, the season where I go through the same thought process for eight weeks in a row. My car is filthy. Inside and out. I can handle the inside being gross -- then I just have to be embarrassed when other people ride in it, or look in it while in a parking lot or something, although I'm usually not around when THAT happens, so that's easy to deny. But the outside...everyone sees it all of the time. And while I find it easy to blithely ignore people's judgement of me on so many things, for some reason, cleanliness of house and car...still sting. I can't embrace my inner swine and be happy in my wallow. I want to do better. I just can't seem to manage it. |
But really, this late in the week, what's the point of washing it now, when it's just going to the Maryland Faire site and get a brand new coating of dust and grime. So, I will, once again, resolve to wash it next Monday or Tuesday, so that I can at least have a few days of clean car before it gets begrimed again. But of course, I'll be too exhausted on Monday, too busy on Tuesday and then it will be Wednesday and well, what's the point of washing it if it's only going to get....
Transporting a jar of pickles that has been opened is like transporting nuclear waste. Although, in some ways, worse. After all, spent plutonium, once you've got it properly sealed up, will tend to want to stay in its container, barring overturned trucks or railroad derailments.
Pickle juice, on the other hand, wants out. I will tighten that jar to the point of breaking the glass, but somehow, on the ride home, it will work itself loose and then, my friends, it's just one curve too tight and the cooler, the car, anything in the cooler and car, will be soaked in pickle juice.
Oh, I've tried zip lock bags over the jar...but a 30 minute car ride is just enough time for pickle juice to find the one pinhole leak in the bag. I've thrown out pickle juice soaked cheese, fruit, meat, chocolates. I've disinfected and hosed out dozens of coolers. Suffered the stink of pickle juice in the upholstery until days later the overall funk of the car once again outweighs it.
Sigh. That's it. I'm done. Leftover pickles go in the trash, no matter how much it hurts my frugal Yankee soul.
Why didn't you tell us earlier you had a toxic nuclear pickle waste disposal problem? I'll just send Anne over after pub sing to hoover them up for you. Child could eat the entire contents of every pickle tray on a Swedish smorgasbord in ten minutes or less. And she'd probably still pester me for a dollar for the pickle guy on the way to the gate.
Free pickles/pickle juice at the petting zoo on sunday afternoon?!
But really, this late in the week, what's the point of washing it now, when it's just going to the Maryland Faire site and get a brand new coating of dust and grime.
Perhaps as a last desperate measure to keep Hurricane Hannah away this weekend...
I mean! Tropical Storm Hanna-without-the-h.
Also, I now want to paint a picture of melty pickles draped over tree branches.
2008-09-05 04:09 pm (UTC)
Pickle juice.................... from the rocketeer
Just a thought... "Pickle Juice Splash", the refreshing new Coke flavor!!!!
Coming soon to your grocer's shelves.
So, I should gift you with a jar of pickles this weekend? ;-)
2008-09-08 12:53 pm (UTC)
Your Blog Title Caused Quite a Stir
As I am perusing the LJ, I see title of this post, and immediately think that you are about to announce that you are in the same fashion as pyratelady. But wait, no - it's not a posting about 'craving' pickles, just how annoyed you are with them. Ok, everything's back to normal.
2008-09-08 01:00 pm (UTC)
Re: Your Blog Title Caused Quite a Stir
Oh, good heavens, no!